Sunday, September 26, 2010

Don't mess with the girl with the megaphone

Today I was working with CTV. I decided to take ONE last shift before I leave tomorrow for my travels...why is money, work is work, experience is experience. Today's lesson? I WORK for the money I have (this fact will come in handy later).

So we are trying to promote CTV's open house where we have free activities inside the CTV building and everyone gets a free tour of the studio. I'm working outside and I am handed a megaphone because everyone else backed off from talking into it. Me? I don't mind so much... I like things that make loud noises. So I'm barking things all day "Come on over to CTV! We have lots of fun and free things for you to do today!... etc etc". At one point, I am told to go over toward Robson and Granville to draw more of a crowd. So me, solo and all, walked in that direction. I sure looked like a crazy woman, megaphone in hand, strolling and talking into a megaphone... (i'm getting paid to yell into a megaphone? SURE. No complaints!).

I make sure that the megaphone is pointed toward the traffic so I don't accidentally yell into someone's ear. I point it upwards to make the least amount of painful noise as possible. When I get to the corner of the street and say one line into the megaphone, the hobo sitting on the corner of the street looks at me and in a snide manner says: "umm, can you NOT do that RIGHT next to me? I'm hungry and trying to get breakfast". Did you hear that? He's "trying to get breakfast," like there's a technique in begging? Come ON.

I was immediately enraged. I responded to the Hobo, made a circular motion with my fingers around my body and said, "you see "this"? "THIS" is ALL public property. I can stand here if i want and talk into this megaphone all day if I want to."

The Hobo says something under his breathe and goes "i was JUST asking" and then mutters something rude again to me. I walk closer to the hobo and go, "Excuse ME?... what did you say?". First off, why would you start a verbal brawl with a chick that's willing to scream at the public with a megaphone? Thats just ASKING for trouble. Anyway, upon realizing that I was deeply angered, he eventually backed down...and I just walked away.

Now, I want to mention, I am not the usual kind to get into arguments with Hobos. Actually, I generally tend to feel bad for them and want to give them food. In retrospect, I was so enraged by this man because I think of ALL the times a hobo has made me feel awkward; Head down, begging for money, making me feel like utter crap when I say "No, sorry". To think of how many people's days are ruined when they have to awkwardly respond, "No...I don't have any change..." or even worse, when you are glared at by a hobo and feel an awful pressure to give them money- not because you want to, but because you were guilted into it. That is the absolute worst.

But, lets be honest here people. When we DO walk away successfully from a hobo, we aren't actually that sorry. We WORKED hard for that money. For instance, I'm a broke- just-out-of-school twenty something, working for every penny I have in my bank account. The key word is I WORKED for it. For ALL the times I have felt MY space intruded by a homeless man, I ignore it and let it be. I walk away. However, the one time I am apparently "intruding" on a homeless man's "space", he berates me?

I DON'T think so.

What really bothers me was that this hobo was literally doing NOTHING all day and, "trying to get breakfast," while I, on the other hand, am actually employed and was only doing my job- trying to make my OWN money so I can pay for my OWN breakfast.

The moral of the story? Don't feel so entitled if you are a hobo. You are taking people's hard earned cash that they worked exhaustingly for. And most of all, DO NOT mess with a girl holding a megaphone in one hand. There will be consequences and no verbal hold back.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

The Evil-est Job in the world

Today i went to yoga. I was all calm, sauna-ed and namaste-d out when I walked outside and saw that my car was TOWED. I parked during rush hour parking on the street. I was tricked because when I parked twenty other cars were parked along where I was. I even had money left in the METER. Yes, i didn't properly read the sign but IT WAS ONLY 45 MINUTES over the time I wasn't allowed there. Geeeeez.

I wanted to cry. My friend picked me up and releasing it from towing cost 94 flipping dollars. NINETY FOUR DOLLARS. and that wasn't even the TICKET. the ticket cost $50. What assholes. I could have fed a family in a 3rd world for a month with that money.

When I was standing in line waiting to retrieve my baby in the tow yard I said "this is the unhappiest, angriest place on earth. If I worked here I would be suicidal because everyone HATES YOU and wants to HURT YOU for touching their damn car". Its true. Their job is to make people's lives a LIVING HELL and as INCONVENIENT as possible. Another thing thats annoying? They always have the tow yard in the middle of NOWHERE-VILLE.

On another note:

If Facebook Existed Centuries Ago

My friend showed me this from the lions den... amazing. Well...dorky, but embrace it for what it is.

True Love

Donkey saves Goat

allowscriptaccess="always" allownetworking="all" allowfullscreen="true"

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Friday, September 10, 2010

Oh Children.

These kids got it spot on.

After being in media studies for so long, I look at what Lady Gaga is doing and it's just hilarious. She knows how to work the pop world... it's like she is coming up with the most insane antics and the audience is just applauding like zombies. Actually, I imagine the audience as seals making a bunch of seal noises when she comes on stage. I can totally see Lady Gaga backstage going, "haha, what idiots". I saw a clip once where she is entering in the airport in Japan and all the paparazzi are going "Ga ga, ga ga! Ga ga!" They sounded like a bunch of babies calling for their mother lord.

But she's smart. What ever gets the money in the bank.

Watch these kids as they re-enact the ridiculousness that is Hollywood and the stupidity that actually makes these stars outrageously rich.

The Hills


Thursday, September 9, 2010

Vince Vaccaro

Catch a Fire. What a feel good song. I love my Vancouver musicians.

Vince Vaccaro - Catch A Fire - Peak Performance Project 2010 from Vince Vaccaro on Vimeo.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

50 cent translator

This is my new favorite passtime. Someone is hilariously translating 50 cents incoherent tweets. BRILLIANT.

50cent: Soulja and fab kicked it they cool now aint no more beef you cock suckers have a nice day lol

English50cent: Soulja and Fab have reconciled their differences, but have run out of meat. Warm regards to my homosexual followers. *laughs*

50cent: I'm starving I been fuckin with yal all day I aint even eat I want some mr chows ima have my driver run and get it

English50cent: My internet activity has led me to forgoe food. I will send my driver to fetch me some Chinese.

Good Dancing, Good Health?

My Petpeeve is when a random guy grinds up behind you and starts humping you from behind. This shows a lack of confidence...why? He is coming from behind in fear you will reject him when you see his face... So if you are a boy, DON'T DO IT. Why can't we dance like in the 50s? Like when people use to ask each other if they can dance with you?

BBC NEWS is saying that Men who dance well shows a sign of good health. Hahahahaha. Who woulda thunk it.

The power of Satellite

1) the power of satellite
2) the power of the internet
3) the power of music

Click HERE NOW for an interactive MUSIC experience. Amazing.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010


I didn't really like Alanis Morrisette when I was younger...but now, in my twenties, I get her music more than ever. She's actually quite amazing. I was listening to "One Hand in My Pocket" and realized how much this song relates to me this exact point in my life. It probably relates to most 20 somethings out there trying to figure their own shit out. What a great song.

I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful baby

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving a high five

I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working, yeah
I care but I'm restless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry baby

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be quite alright
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is flicking a cigarette

And what it all comes down to
Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving the peace sign

I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm hard but I'm friendly baby
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chickenshit
I'm sick but I'm pretty baby

And what it all boils down to
Is that no one's really got it figured out just yet
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is playing the piano

And what it all comes down to my friends
Is that everything's just fine fine fine
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is hailing a taxi cab

There's this place...

For the last two weeks i've been driving through the infamous east hastings street with CTV. Every time we drive by there's always something rediculous going on. Actually, it would be an amazing place for a professional photographer to go to and capture some bizzare moments on camera. One time we were driving by, we saw a man in a yellow afro wig sitting in a dumpster while police was arresting some other person accross the street.

Another time, we were stopped at a light. I was staring at a woman who seemed completely out of place- she was wearing nice heels, a Burberry scarf and holding a red umbrella. She looked really uncomfortable. I look to her left and there was this dazed man in a dirty white shirt standing near her. Suddenly he just vomited onto the street. I'm not talking about a pathetic was like a scene from a movie. Almost like in "I love you man" when the main character is playing a drinking game and projectile vomits all over the other guy kind of vomit. Just as all of us were in the car going "eeeeeew, i'm going to barf from seeing that"... it happens AGAIN. The funny part was when he finished, he just went about his day as if NOTHING had happened.

I remember driving by and seeing a homeless man with a viking hat and wearing mardi gras beads. After I pointed him out, my friend goes "I remember him. I've been driving by here so much that I am starting to recognize homeless people".

Anyway, there's this store we always drive by...its called "Save On Meats". It's rather creepy looking...especially at night time when its sign is glowing all florescent-like. In fact, whatever this place might be, reminds me of a scene in a horror movie. Kind of like the eeriness you feel when you see an image of a fluorescent flickering motel sign in the middle of a deserted highway. I mean, the image of a flying, smiling pig holding a plate of meat is just creepy in itself. It's like a human holding a plate of human meat going "come on in!".

In the day time, "Save on Meats" is ALWAYS empty...but at night, there is always a massive line outside of it. We have come to the conclusion it is an underground night club for homeless people. A place for druggy grooving and other promiscuous things. My friend goes: "Well, homeless people need to party too, they are probably the best dancers". haha.

OK, OK, I know making fun of the druggy homeless isn't funny. It's just absolutely rediculous on East Hastings. You have to be there to really experience it in all its craziness. All you really can do is observe, contemplate and sometimes make a little fun of the obscene things that you witness there.